Happy Groundhog Day/7-Month Birthday!!!

Today is Groundhog day. The day on which we celebrate our inadequacies by staring at large rodents, hoping for warm weather, and living the same day over and over again until we metamorphosize from surly, miserable weathermen to charming, piano-playing, ice-sculpting gentlemen capable of wooing Andie MacDowell in a single day. At least that's what Google told me.

Today also happens to be my 7-MONTH BIRTHDAY!!! (...for I'm a jolly good fellow, for I'm a jolly good fellow...) Thank you for the standing ovation; you may be seated. In honor of my special day I want to take a moment to thank all the little people who have been a part of my Pit Crew. A world champion like myself is only as good as his team. So a special thanks to those that regularly check my fluids, scrub my undercarriage, rotate my diapers, and give me an occasional lube when my chassis is raw. I couldn't have done it without y'all.

As a treat please enjoy my latest racy photospread:

That's right, 7 months people.

This is my look of concern I've been perfecting. I've been able to practice it quite a bit, especially after observing my folks' parenting skills.

I'm over two feet tall and growing. Watch yourself Yao Ming.

Do you ever feel like someone is constantly hovering over you with a camera? I do. A lot.

This pose is designed to represent the happiness and joy that women across the world are feeling because I am naked. As always, you're welcome ladies.

I need to apologize to all the pregnant mothers out there. God used up all his cuteness when he made me. Sorry your kids will be ugly. Cuteness is on backorder for at least 6 months.

I do drama in addition to romantic comedies.

Which cheeks do you want to pinch more? It's one of life's most difficult quandaries. I call it Liam's Cheeky Dilemma.

Who needs teeth when you have a smile like this?

Just to make it explicitly clear, no ladies I will not pretend to be your child to make all the other neighborhood moms jealous. However, I will make an appearance at your kids birthday party for a fee. My rates are currently $10,000/hr plus 2 cases of applesauce.